The sun before the Noon...

Recollecting this past week.
Thinking of what i've learnt, said and seen.

Of stories and games. Seems so reverting, those fantasy
games. With their complex story lines... always somehow,
having something to do with time, 'creation' and religion.

Yet almost always.. they fall back onto Christian texts.
Then remodelling it and combining them with myth and science.
To create a link, seemingly seemless. And I just find myself caught
up in the story sometimes. Don't know about the rest, but i think
most gamers do and that's why the final fantasy series is so popular.
Even The Matrix. Though trying to deal with philosophy, has so much
Christian ideas in it.

Does this say something about us humans... even though we may have
differing views. We are all dying to know some truth? All so hooked on
knowning that there's something beyond. Maybe we're created this way,
to want to seek out a God? Which in the Bible is true.

Anyway, that aside... it's also a sad week. Not for me but a friend.
For his sudden departure of his Dad.
It happened so sudden in a way and I don't know how he's taking it now.
Don't know if he's going to be asking why.... or blaming anyone or anything
inside him. But i guess he's matured enough, and being the first child,
he's got to settle lots of things. I feel for him. His burden and all.
Guess he's got lots of paper work to settle and then his job to keep him
occupied. But don't know if he's alright inside. Don't know how to help him,
but i guess i'll just pray... hope his faith will be strong.

Guess it just reinforces the fact that life's just so fragile.
Gotta treasure what we have. Who we know. Those we care for.
But guess what, it ain't that easy. For we're all too caught up
in our own lives...

Feeling drained, tired.
Needing a break.
Gonna have it in 4 hrs time.

Gonna leave.
Gonna say good bye.
For three days.

Off to Tioman,
To where the beach is white
And the water blue.

I hope. :)

The slow dawn...

Got the rest i needed.
Feel as shitty still.
Not quite as bad as i thought.

Been turning down requests these days,
not sure why too.
Because i'm running, wanting to be alone?
Need to sort out myself with HIM?

Enjoyed the punggol night air with a friend,
Enjoyed the chatting and sharing,
Found abit of myself that i've lost,
And learnt abit more... and understood abit more.

Said what i've felt these days,
Regreting if it was right or wrong.
But after that i felt i've learnt some thing...
Then i realised it's perhaps meant for me to do so.

Don't have to be in it,
To still be able to contact them.
To be able to keep in touch.
I've just another path to take that's all.

There's phones and icq and msn these days.
Gotta try not to think of me too much,
Gotta get out of the shell.
To see the ones around me,
Needing comfort... maybe.

Beginning of the end...

Finally it's over.. all those nights of OT and packing.
Been so tired that i've fallen ill on tues... argh... bad
throat, dunno how come it can lead on to such a bad fever...
had trouble going home that day... almost couldn't make it..
didn't felt so giddy before, body losing control.
KO on floor after i got home, it never felt more cooler
in my life.... ahhhhh...

Anyway, i'm well enough to write now, but still i can't swallow.
ARGh... saw my friends eating all those other 'hard' food.. so tempting
and all i can do is eat soupy and porridgey stuff. Sigh.... tummy feels
so empty... haha.

Hz, Hw and B have left for reservist, think staying on there is
gonna be a little bit more boring... but at least there's still some
jokers around for me to play with. :) So guess it'll be alright... just
some extra cash to last for next sem... hopefully.

~ PHS was once in a red team, going on to the finals. Along the way,
he experienced all kinds of emotions, fears , joy, sadness, etc. But
was determined to make it through to the finals.
Halfway through the semi finals, PHS sustained an injury that couldn't
allow him to play anymore. How sad he is... for he had always wanted to
go to the end with his team mates.
Now he can only watch from the stands...imagining to be there on the field.

~ This path that's taken has been set,
As a guide and gift from above,
For a request made long ago,
Then only a lost wanderer.

Not knowing whether to accept
The signs seen before,
Only going through step by step,
Slowly seeing the truth beyond.

Accepting that which came to pass,
The end which was only a beginning,
A new phase that brought more changes,
And problems to keep one awake.

Taking away that which is of pride,
But most of all the bonds formed,
Leaving behind a new beginning,
Finding and having new acceptance.

Though it aches.
Though still smiling.
Inside is a turmoil of battles left unsettled...

Tired out PHS...

Been a tiring match, but the scores are out for this week.
PHS 6 - SBS 0

3 more matches to go, hopefully PHS doesn't give up and
will be able to tackle any of SBS's foul plays.

Enough of the scores, been seeing lots of papers the past week.
Lots of countings and tapings. And stormy weathers that cleared
with generally strong winds blowing northwards.
Won't be seeing the clouds soon i hope. :)

One thing struck me though... was the Jack Neo's new movie.
"Best Bet". Each morning held untold horror if i missed the train
transfer at Dhoby Ghaut. Untold repeats of "Bai Liu Li Bai Hui Bu Hui Kai..."
rang throughout the quiet morning station. Neves were twitching and
the smile couldn't help breaking out at first... but by the 6th day....
ARGHHHHHHHH....!
Think the comics section in today's Life best decscribed what i felt! hahaha.

Also .... I hate to say this... but i think China people are cheats.
Kaoz, even before the exam has ended we've already got quite a number who
had notes finding their ways into pockets and even getting themselves written on
transperent pencil boxes. Ok maybe it's just a minority of them but guess they must
be quite desperate... but what would make of them if they do go out to work in
some company next time... will they change figures if things don't tally ???

Missed a camp... felt bad... but then again i really can't go and my body's kinda
breaking down... 12hrs last night and i still feel sleepy! haha. I'm old... sigh.
But then.. i remembered a friend saying that, what's the point in feeling bad about
something you've already done. Make it up with future actions. Guess that's true...

Anyway just had renewed interest in D2. Anyone out there playing...? Wanna TCP/IP?
:)

~Victory Short Lived...~

0720 Hrs, The stage was set, the players at the ready.
SBS had started warm up earlier before the break of dawn.

0655, PHS (Punggol Home Stayer) just got up, and lazily
prepared for the match.
0722, PHS left home ground and started with a slow walk.
Sensing SBS catching up at 0726, PHS quickened the pace
and beat the red light to catch SBS at 0728.

0730 saw the arrival of both players. PHS sensing the
departure at 0733, made long steps towards SBS home ground.
The clock was ticking and was screaming "2MINS".

More then enough time, PHS took the path to glory in style,
taking his time to move to the finish line.
1Min left! GOAL! He touched down and scored the long awaited goal!
Finding his place in the arena, he took seat and enjoyed
the fruits of the winning.

PHS saw a beachball came in halfway, felt like moving to it,
but didn't. After 10 sec, moving didn't seem like the right
thing to do. The crowds would be wondering.. or would they?
Then Beachball just stayed there til the end. PHS felt guilty and
weird.

Today's Noobs were going for field trip. Had fun riding around.
But CAT 1 dominated most of the day. Windy conditions, blowing thunder clouds
here and there. Lightening was seen as different times of the day.
Poor PHS took the thunder stike and the storm started to subside some what.
The noobs were seeking shelter and a few lucky ones found it at the pantry.

Now we shall prepare for another battle ....

This is for Ben. The lyrics are what i've been telling you about.
Artist: Liz Phair
You think that I go home at night
Take off my clothes, turn out the lights
But I burn letters that I write
To you, to make you love me

Yeah, I drive naked through the park
And run the stop sign in the dark
Stand in the street, yell out my heart
To make, to make you love me

I am extraordinary
If you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary
I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
You may not believe in me
But I believe in you
So I still take the trash out
Does that make me too normal for you

So dig a little deeper cause
You still don't get it yet
See me lickin' my lips, need a primitive fix
And I'll make, I'll make you love me

I am extraordinary
If you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary
I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
See me jump through hoops for you
You stand there watching me performing
What exactly do you do
Have you ever thought it's you that's boring
Who the hell are you

I am extraordinary
If you'd ever get to know me
I am extraordinary
I am just your ordinary
Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho

Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho

Average every day sane psycho
Supergoddess
Average every day sane psycho

Average every day sane psycho

THE TROUBLE WITH TRANSPORT

What's it with the public transport these days.
Always seem to have funny problems coming up one!
NEL NEL.... haiz.

The sign put 2 mins to departure... I got in,
and waited... 1 min.... 3min... oh the train at the
other side has arrived. 1 min more... Ding Dong, train
doors closing... thought i would be moving off.
Hmm not moving....
opened eyes...
Woo ... the train on the other side has left.
What luck.... then 5 mins later... i finally felt
the train move. But what the heck. I'm too tired to bother.
Just slept my way through.
Saw a colleague at orchard... then he met up with 2 others.
Glad to be with them. At least wun come in too late alone. Haha!

Well, it's been another day,
feeling damn tired, dunno why.
Yet i still am dragging myself to carry on
the day till the wee hours.

Started out rather hectic though,
i purposely tried to get out earlier today,
but missed just by a few sec, the 0733 train.
Then when i reached PS at ard 0805, i went to the
bus stop at park mall, i saw 605, tried to catch it...
BUT! knn it sped off just as i crossed the road.

Then i had to wait like til 0820 before 190 came.
But in the end i was late for like 5-10mins.
Damn sian... even when i try to be early, i can't.

Guess it just means things are never really under our
control. Felt kinda mad at first, but as i thought about
it, there's no point in it and it's a good way to train
one's patience and tolerance level? Haha...

Work, started with us helping out to usher the invigilators,
had fun seeing my friends there and also the chio bus.
haha. But then after lunch.. things slowed down and
i was constantly fighting the zee monster who seemed to
love creeping up behind me and stunning me. Dohz.

Well, i'm glad i had company on the journey home today,
enjoyed catching up with those 2 rascals. One vain pot and
the other a whiney singer. Hahah...
Anyway Here's something heartwarming for those
who pass by to "peng chang" :)

Red Sun on a blue monday

Start of the week,
ain't that bad.
Had some fun and laughter.

Saw some pretty sights as i
walked down orchard to home.
Though tired, yet i still managed
somehow though to keep on moving.

Kinda obsessed with minesweeper,
A constant challenge to the mind.
But it's draining, parts of me away.

Did not do that which will
keep me from pain today while i
clicked furiously for mines to seek.

Now i remember, the setting sun,
out of the station as i've seen.
Red it was, and 3 blimps accompanined the scene.

The whitish clouds in the sky, in
the flat plains called punggol,
I saw white and red and black too.

Thunder flashed in the blackness,
as the the red floating plains, turned redder still.
Til as i walked and turned around, and saw
them joined in darkness.

The lightness too, in the south, slowly faded
and that ended my glorious pleasure,
with much regret for my olympus was at home.